Codependency is having an unhealthy relationship where one person supports or enables another person’s addiction, poor mental health, irresponsibility, etc. It is actually an addiction in itself and the validation that one gets from the relationship is what keeps it going.

Codependency impacts an individual’s ability to have a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship.

Someone that struggles with codependency looks externally to build self worth. What ends up happening is one’s mood and identity is defined by the other person.

Enabling usually occurs to ease relationship tension. Enabling behavior, which is rarely seen in healthy relationships, includes repeatedly giving in, accepting excuses, always being the one to try to work on things, fixing their problems, ignoring your problems, etc. It’s the constant rescuing that allows the destructive and unhealthy course. As this cycle continues, codependency provides a sense of reward from being needed. It becomes obsessive and feelings of helplessness begin to occur, as one feels stuck, unable to stop the vicious cycle.

If you answered yes to the majority of the questions below, we can work on developing healthy relationships by being assertive, identifying boundaries, and building trust.

Having negative, self-defeating thoughts?
Do you have an exaggerated sense of responsibility for the actions of others?
Do you find yourself putting others before you?
Do you struggle with saying no?
Find yourself looking for approval?
Will do anything to hold on to a relationship to avoid the feeling of abandonment and rejection?
When you try to be assertive, you feel guilty?
Do you lack trust in yourself and/or others, which leads to difficulty making decisions?
Not knowing what you truly need because of difficulties identifying feelings?
Problems with intimacy, struggle with being open and close to someone?